Friday, January 8, 2010

Happyisms

Andrew and I went to the Boise Contemporary Theater a couple weeks ago and saw their production of "Animals in Paper."
One of the characters had a book in which he catalogued all of his blessings. Sometimes it was simple things like, "My health." Sometimes it was something more concrete, "I bought a good rake today. It works well." He had written thousands of blessings in this little book over the years.

I am charmed by this concept. I'd like to begin.

1. Free thinking. Ideas that inspire and beget more ideas.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Title and Registration

Well Friends, I am switching locations. I got a .mac account, and the forum is just so much sweeter.
You can catch me at


http://web.mac.com/heidy8


There are photo albums and different pages. I am in love!

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

WTF?!?!?!

Doggie wigs

Then click on the link to watch the video.

and in case you want to go straight to the source
The Source

Sunday, August 5, 2007

Come Back, Gilbert Desh, Inventor Of The Taco Salad!

We had a fantastic couple of days with Greg, Andrew's dad, who came to visit. Andrew and Greg hit the Wildlife Museum and 4th Ave, and I joined them for Mt. Lemmon, Biosphere 2, and Hotel Congress, to name a few. The only thing- we didn't have a big storm for him to experience. A few little storms made the air heavy, but he didn't get to experience the pyrotechnics of a Tucson Monsoon storm. Boo. That's okay. We took him to Mariscos Chihuahua (must be said in an outrageous Mexican accent), and watched "The Borne Ultimatum," (fantastic car chase scenes, and fight scenes- "Jason Borne, you're my hero!") drank Bud Light with squeezed lime juice, and just chatty chat chatted. Honestly, that was my favorite part. I know, I know, that's a very cheesy and girl thing to say, but it really was!

It seemed we talked about everything. Andrew and his father are really very similar. It's no wonder I love Greg nearly as much as Andrew. They have the same random and killer sense of humor. We didn't want Greg to leave. It was so nice having him here.
Andrew and Greg at Mt. Lemmon
Andrew and me at Mt. Lemmon
Greg and me
Mt. Lemmon sunset

Sunday, July 29, 2007

With my lightning bolts a-glowing I can see where I am going...


Monsoon has sprung, and our afternoons have become dark and spongy, perfect for curling up with a good book or an Andrew. If we were of the religious variety and were living when the Earth was still flat, I am certian we would be checking the skies for Thor and his hammer, balls of fire, and Zeus laughing, using his lightning bolts like scissors.

At work the other day, hammering started in the form of quarter-sized rain drops. The five-lane road in front of our office was a flooded river. My co-workers and I watched as a cardboard box-come-sailboat navigated past. Cars were pulling over, the rain water flowing over their wheel bases. In one underpass, a car drowned in seven feet of water.

Thunder is the loudest I've ever heard. Like in the old movies or plays when behind stage or camera they'd shake giant peices of tin and nearly blast the audience away. Andrew and I resist the urge to cover our heads and duck (maybe an inherent instict left over from the Zeus days?), then grin at each other sheepishly. Secretly we're both looking around the see if the ground has splt into two, the world ripping apart.

Then the rainbows come. Double rainbows, spanning one side of the valley to the next.




Friday, July 27, 2007

Roll it around in your mouth

Words I really like the sound of:
malfeasance
pergola
lozenge
bellybutton
unctious

Words I do not:
coif

Monday, July 23, 2007

Thank You, Thank You, Thank You!!!!!!!!


This Last weekend Andrew and I flew to Sacramento to Andrew's parents' ranch to surprise Steve (who, with his girlfriend, also flew in) for his birthday. Aunt Sukey came too! We had the best weekend. The night before we left, we were so excited we had trouble sleeping.

Greg picked us up at the airport while Gail picked up Steve, Lindsay, and Aunt Sukey who came in shortly after we did. Sneaky Sneaky. They arrived at the ranch where we were waiting for them, and in he walked. Andrew and I have missed Steve and Lindsay immensely. We've missed the whole family immensely! We were so happy to see everyone, and to have everyone in one place. That never happens.

Friday we spent on Folsom lake, water-skiing and swimming. The water was so warm, and we splashed about nearly all day. They have floating outhouses. I've never seen that before. But it makes a certain kind of sense.
We went to dinner at the Ale House- so yummy in my tummy. Then decided to have a little fun at the hotel. We played a few drinking games with Steve and Linds, and I will never forget Andrew's impression of "Dancing like a cookie," and the story of him fainting in the 2nd grade and no one noticing.

The next dawned with us getting breakfast at "Ma Calendar's" as Greg calls it (ask Andrew about his awesome coffee), and running to Costco to get THE SEVENTH HARRY POTTER BOOK!!!!! We had a Birthday Barbeque at the ranch which meant more food and laughing. I love this family so much. I just love the stories told and the funny quips.

That evening we drove into Sacramento for a River Cats baseball game and fireworks. It was perfect. The whole weekend. It was just so good to be there with no drama, nothing but everyone loving on one another. Andrew and I didn't want to leave. We are thinking of maybe making Sacramento our home some time down the road. We'd be near Andrew's parents, who I've fallen in love with over the past year and a half, and not too far from mine. The city is very much like Boise- it's the capital, has a river running through it, has many surrounding burbs, etc. We're thinking about it, anyway. It just feels good there.

This weekend was the greatest treat. We are so lucky that Greg and Gail set the whole thing up.

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Sunbathing in Your Radiance

I was sitting here reading while Andrew played his guitar, and it hit me, as it sometimes does, how much I adore this man I get to see everyday. I sometimes can't believe my luck. 
Andrew has more depth to him than most people, and he is so loving and silly.  I sometimes get so happy by little things with him.  Like the other day I went to call him to let him know I was on my way home, and it struck me as I pressed the first speed dial button that he was the FIRST speed dial person.  I've called him this way a million times.  I don't know why, but it just made me so happy that I had him as my #1.
We reach for each other often in the middle of the night, just to make sure one another is there. In the morning it is usual for me to wake to snuggles. We make each other laugh repeatedly with a million little "inside jokes." We have our own rediculous language that I'm sure would sound foreign to anyone other than us. And I am always calmed by his voice. I delight in taking care of him, and why not? He takes such care of me.
His hands strum his guitar, and I am reminded of when we were first dating. I used to watch the way his fingers plucked and pressed the strings on his Taylor, and I felt myself falling in love.
It is the same still.

I've got to go, I've got more Andrew to listen to.

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Marrissa Cooper died tonight. I knew it was coming, but I still can't believe that she did. Especially as she somewhat redeemed herself towards the end. Hrm.

We found an apt. I am pretty dang excited about it. It is a bit of a drive from my work (about 25-30 minutes), but closer for Andrew Handsome Pants. But the coolest part is that it is the best and newest one we looked at (about 12 or 13 different places) and the cheapest! Minty! It has 9 ft ceilings, a pool with stone lions spitting into it, spa, really nice workout center, and it is at the base of these gorgeous mountains.


Of these photos, our apartment living room is the main photo, and then the bedroom on the top right is ours as well. The other two photos, crap. Please disregard.
So we move in September 1-ish. We are ready to have our own place again, not that it won't be hard to leave our foster home in the west mountains. I sure will miss being able to sun bathe in the buff. I'll miss the remote control window shades (there are four in a row, and we sometimes have races to see if we can get the last one going before the first one is done), and the garage, the bunnies- but we might have some out there- and the garden. Oh I will miss the garden.

Monday, July 9, 2007

Fortho

*It should be noted that when I was little I didn't realize that TheFourthOfJuly was actually the fourth day of July. I thought it was one word- Forthojuly. So when I was marking dates in our family's calendar my mom told me that the Forthojuly was on the fourth of July, and I marked it accordingly. My family will never let me live that down, and in fact we still celebrate Forthojuly. It is remarkably similar to the Fourth of July.

For this Fortho Andrew and I decided to jet up to Phoenix for the night. We found a Hilton Resort and got a great mid-week room rate. We got to our suite, donned our white hotel robes, and ordered room service. Sandwiches, beer, and chocolate covered strawberries. The room was awesome. We had a great view as we were up on a bit of a cliff. There were all sorts of shoppes, restaurants, and several swimming pools with water slides. Wednesday we woke up, read in bed a little, (Harry Potter, anyone?) then threw on our suits, and walked down to get some breakfast. We then spent the remainder of the day by the pool, reading, swimming, and relaxing. It was so bourgie and ostentacious. We ordered drinks by the pool. A guy even came around with chilled mango-infused washclothes to cool us off.
We headed home late in the afternoon with slight sunburns, and me a slight buzz, congratulating ourselves for a trip well done.

I love my boyfriend.

The temperature outside- 117 degrees.

On the way home...

Sunday, July 1, 2007

One By One All Day

I completed my first week at my new job! The first few days were a little overwhelming. Having never worked in the interior design industry, there is a lot for me to learn. But now that I am learning more and doing more, I am liking it quite a lot. It's a little family, there are only 6 of us. Everyone looks out for everyone else.

Plus, I got to order new planning stuff for my Franklin Covey planner! Office supplies and planning stuff excite me.
I'm not sure why.

We saw "Evan Almighty" last night. It was about as good as can be expected. There were a few funny parts. Very few. All in all it wasn't bad, just not awesome.

And now I am enjoying my Sunday watching "Girls Just Want To Have Fun."
I finished my book, "Water For Elephants." It was set with a circus backdrop in 1931. I don't remember ever going to a circus when I was little. I'm not sure there were any in Alaska. It made me want to go see one now. I would imagine they take a lot better care of the animals now. Hopefully anyway.
I'm thinking I might read the 6th Harry Potter in prep for the 7th (19 days, 11 hours, 31 minutes, 48 seconds).
Oh Hurry Up Harry!

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Free Marissa


We are now on the 3rd disc of the 3rd season of The OC. I wish they'd kill Marissa already. This girl is gorgeous. Gorgeous! However, she can't act, and (though I know it is the writers who make it so) she is dumb as shit! I mean really! How can you not realize that yet another guy friend is in love with you?!? You can't save every person who "needs" you.
Get over yourself!
Kill her already!

(It should be noted that I haven't seen either season 3 or 4, but because I live in America and am of a certian age, I do know that Marissa dies)

Oh, in this episode, they are trying to get Marissa back into Harbor, and they've made these great "Free Marissa" t-shirts. I kinda want one.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Andrew Potter and the Lost Game of Gin

Should there have been nine Harry Potter books, Andrew would have to read them all, per the gin rummy agreement. As it happens there are only six, soon to be seven. (22 days, 2 hours, 55 minutes, and 28 seconds)
Summer reading has begun!

I am reading a book called, "Water for Elephants." I reccommend it. I am about half way through. We picked it up at Costco last week. It is written well, and the characters are vivid and real.

Friday, June 22, 2007

Adding A Little Texture


I have a new job! I will be working for an interior design company called Robinson and Shades. I am so excited about this. It is a small firm with four designers including the partners. I met both partners, and they seem to be really great people. It is an intimate little family. And this came at such a good time. I really needed this after we found out that we couldn't get a puppy. We were so dissapointed. I start on Monday, and I will have nearly a full month of training with the woman I am replacing. I have a very good feeling about this firm and these people, and with Andrew doing so well at Apple, things just keep getting better.

Also, Andrew has a new obsession. He purchased a Nikon D40 camera. It is so freaking cool. It takes the best photos. Case in point- this orchid shot.
He hasn't taken the thing off his neck since he got it. I find it very comical. Unfortunately, since he has only so many photo ops here around the house, it means he has been snapping a bazillion photos of me. All of which are completely unflattering. When I'm watching tv, "Come on, just let me take some candids," when I'm doing dishes, "Give me some love!" when I'm getting out of the car, when I'm getting ready in the morning, basically when I'm doing anything. I'm hoping the novelty will wear off soon.

We have been playing a lot of gin rummy. We usually play this when we are watching The OC (which btw, season 3 starts out badly. Where is the wit? Where is the development? But it seems to be picking up). We have a little bet. We are playing to 5000 points. It goes like this- If I win, Andrew has to read Harry Potter. I have been trying to get him to read these for ages. Even Aunt Sukey rallied and tried to convince him. I'm not really sure why he refuses, because I know that if he read them, he would LOVE them. How ever many hundreds of points I beat him by equals another book he has to read. So if I beat him by 400 points, he has to read Harry Potter 1, 2, 3, and 4. Now if Andrew wins, I have to make him breakfast in bed for a week, and how ever many hundred points he wins by is another week. It is going well, and I think Andrew will soon have some summer reading. Just in time for the release of "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows," which is in 28 days, 10 hours, 10 minutes and 38 seconds (I have a widget on my desktop that counts down to the book release and the fifth movie release).

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Cosmic Slop

This should be an intresting modge-podge of stories. Including (but not limited to) golfing, monsoon, scorpions, watermelon, apple, owen, and George, Brad, Matt and the boys.

Monday dawned a day cooler than we've had in a while. Andrew and I grabbed our balls and headed to the golf course.
Half way through the back nine, the sky darkened and became tangible. Chunky graphite clouds shuffled across the sky, and we felt pins of rain in our hair and on our arms. We decided to call it a day.
"Let's go to Costco!" Andrew shouted. I'm never one to turn down a Costco trip, just ask my mom. Several books and a box of 24 bocca burgers later, she'll tell you. So we headed to the North Costco. In the quick 10 minute trip from the golf course, rain had begun to fall. It really wasn't torrential, though. We dashed into Costco, and managed to still be fairly dry. After wandering through the ailes of plasma tvs, and lovingly addressing each of them, we got what we needed and headed outside. Rain was falling exponentially harder. The parking lot was flooded. People were huddled under awnings, talking to each other, gazing at the sky, waxing lyrical. It was a movie set. Nothing brings strangers together like talking about that flirt, Mother Nature.
With our wipers on high, we navigated through the city. There are a lot roller-coaster roads around here, which is to say, lots of dips and baby hills. The ground is so dry that it has a hard time soaking up the deluge of rain. Every dip was a miniature pond. We sloshed our way home.

We found this guy in the sink two nights ago. He is a bark scorpion. He came up our sink pipes. At first I was very fascinated by him.
And then we googled him. Evidently he is the most poisonous scorpion here in the Southwest. Awesome. He can kill small children and the elderly. The only good thing- he can't climb on glass or smooth surfaces. So he can climb up our sink pipes, but he can't climb out of the sink.
We now keep our drains plugged unless we are using them.

By happy accident, Andrew and I have discovered a most delicious treat. Watermelon and Lemon. I was cutting Lemon with a huge butcher knife to put down the garbage disposal and get rid of the smelly funk. Andrew then cut watermelon with said knife right where I cut the lemon, et voila! An amalgamate of sweet and sour. Tang and sugar. Now we habitually squeeze lemon on our watermelon. I once read that LSD was discovered in much the same manner.


Andrew had his first day of work at Apple today! I met him for sushi on his lunch break and somehow the waitress thought it was one of our birthdays. Because we occasionally play this joke on one another, I thought he had told her before I got there that it was my birthday. He thought I told her it was his when he used the restroom. We looked at each other, both trying to play it off, when she asked if we had room for birthday dessert. Andrew says to me, "Is it my birthday!" And under my breath I say, "I guess so." (Seriously- Andrew, next time wait for the waitress to leave before asking this question) We look around the restaurant to see if anyone looks particularly festive, and maybe we are stealing their birthday dessert. On this particular day, though, people were very droll. So we enjoyed a little bit of fried icecream. When I paid, I kept thinking how funny it would have been had he paid, and upon giving his card, the woman was like, "Uh, I'm gonna need to see some i.d." Oh, and Andrew is liking his new job very much. It is a great company to work for, one that likes to promote from within, and very much takes care of their employees.

Our orchid from Trader Joe's, we named him Owen, is doing very well. He is really quite gorgeous.













And Finally- For Movie Night this week we saw Ocean's 13. Now after Ocean's 12, we weren't expecting a whole lot. I thought Ocean's 12 was toilet water. But this one was surprisingly good. Much more like the first one. Plus Ellen Barkin was in it, and I fell in love with her hair. I am kind of thinking of cutting mine, but not sure if I could pull off a do that short. But it was a very satisfying movie, I wish Bernie Mac had a little more face time, but that is my only major complaint.

And I'm out.

Friday, June 8, 2007

Mt. Lemmon-aid


Andrew and I have realized that we are water people. Where there is water, there is life. The desert has a certain charm, to be sure, but it is a charm that is a little lost on the two of us. We started to get a little stir crazy. Then we found out about Mt Lemmon. We saw pine trees! And we were up so high that it actually cooled about 25 degrees. We got there right before sunset. We could breathe.

8 Mile


Hike, that is. Yesterday we went on an 8 mile hike up Sabino Canyon to Seven Falls. Had there actually been water flowing, I'm sure it would have been incredible- like this. But as it happened, it is not yet Monsoon season. It was a good hike, nonetheless. Right before we started, though, while at the Visitor's Center, I stepped off the sidewalk and twisted my ankle. I thought I had sprained it. I stood up to test it, and it seemed okay. We hiked up the 4 miles. On the way back down it started to ache a little after I took my shoe off to shake out some pebbles. Then Last night it was swollen and I couldn't walk on it. Yikes! I iced it and elevated it. This morning it feels almost normal, so I think I am okay. Phew!

Anyway, the hike was great. Not too difficult, but definately trying in a few areas. When we parked, they gave us a trail map and a green xerox that we didn't look at until we got up to Seven Falls. It was a flyer warning us of the dangers of Cougars in that area. There has evidently been a bunch of sightings. The flyer warned us, and I quote, "Some 'problem' mountain lions in Sabino Canyon have recently displayed aberrant behavior that is know to precede attacks on humans. This behavior includes:
* Active during daylight hours
* Unafraid of humans
* Stalking humans"

STALKING HUMANS! It also warned that you should NEVER hike at Dawn or Dusk. As it was approaching evening when we got to the top, after a quick respite we hauled ass down the mountain. It took us about 2hours and 40 minutes to get to the top, we made it down in about 1 hour and 30 minutes. It always goes faster coming down, but we were in a canyon that was starting to get dark.





When there are only two of you, you get good at taking self-portraits.
We are definately going back when it is Monsoon.

Wednesday, June 6, 2007

My Favorite Time of Day is Rosemary

Every morning we get up and water the gardens. We've Hibiscus and Salvia Greggi, Roses and Mexican Heather, Acacia trees and Birds of Paradise. My favorite is the Rosemary in the front courtyard. The water from the hose is always warm and acts like a diffuser. The wind this morning was gusty, warm and spun like a top, swirling both my hair and the rosemary perfurme up and around me. The sun had not yet burnt through a cloudy haze; the sky was a dirty blue. And it was silent except for the soft "tappa" of the hose water and the air buffering about me.

Tuesday, June 5, 2007

Drinkin and Gettin My Hairs Cut

Yesterday Andrew and I realized we were in dire need of haircuts. We set off in search of a salon. We tried one called Metropolis, but they weren't very forthcoming and were kinda snooty. We were told there was a salon in the hotel down the street. We went to the Club Congress, which is one of the oldest hotels in Tucson. We had been meaning to have a drink there anyway. It has been written up as one of the best clubs/hotels in the Southwest in Esquire, Rolling Stone, National Geographic, Spirit, Sunset, Playboy, Blender, and about a dozen more. It is super historic and well-preserved. Our bartender, Tiger, is seriously in his 70's and has been bartending there for 46 years. 46 years!!! He told us all sorts of crazy stories: One guy stayed at the hotel for 40 years with a monthly rate of $700. He finally died in his room. John Dillinger's henchman was arrested in this hotel with a slew of guns, and John himself was arrested on 4th Ave which is about three blocks over.
After a few G & T's with Tiger we set out to accomplish the meaning of the quest (The hotel's salon was closed on Mondays). We remembered there was a salon down on 4th next to The Surly Wench, our favorite Tucson Bar. Unfortunately, when we got there, this salon was also closed! We stomped our feet and decided the only thing we could do was have another drink, this time at The Surly Wench.
As you may or may not know, drunk people tend to be hungry people. Our next stop was Magpie's Pizza. Mmmmmm.

Our quest was a bust.

However, when we were standing outside of The Surly Wench, one of the salon guys happened to be there, and we made an appt for today. Yay!


Sunday, June 3, 2007

The O-Sizzle


Last night we decided to watch a few more episodes of The OC. But we decided to make it into a drinking game. We got greasy Chinese take-out, a couple Bud Lights, and settled in. Here were the rules-

You have to take a drink of your prefered beverage any time one of the following happens-

Ryan answers a question with a look instead of words
Summer says, "Coop!" or "Cohen!"
Seth makes a comic book reference
Marissa drinks
Kirsten drinks
Caleb says, "Kiki" or "JuJu"
Jimmy sighs
Anyone lies

Then there was a penalty shot of your choice of liquor when ever the following senario takes place-

One of the boys calls or comes home and Kirsten and Sandy say, "Hey Fellas! Where've you guys been?"
They answer with "Chino," or "The Hospital," or "Jail," or "I went to see_______ (insert name of someone who is Trouble)." Then Sandy or Kirsten immediately exclaim, "Are you okay?!?!?!"

This happens more than you might think. I think this happened every other episode in the first season. We are now on the the second season so we'll see if the pattern continues.

By the second episode we were so full of beer and Chinese that our tummies were sticking out. We couldn't stop laughing because everytime we tried to hug each other, our stomachs got in the way.

It's okay, though. Both Seth and Ryan came home to Newport, school started, and Seth has plans to win Summer back. Caleb just got arrested, Marissa is drinking a lot, even at school, Theresa lied and told Ryan she wasn't pregnant, Ryan's new calc partner is a handful, but I have a feeling she'll become a love interest. Seth got a job at the concert venue, Jimmy is rich, Sandy surfs in the morning, Julie has her second bankrupt husband, but still wants to buy Kaitlin that pony. Pony=bankruptcy. Kirsten still drinks wine with every meal and manages to run the whole of The Newport Group, remodel the house, go to Yogalates, and look polished and gorgeous.

I can't wait to get to the next episode.

Saturday, June 2, 2007

Knocked Up!

Andrew and I saw "Knocked Up" last night. It was VERY good. It was about two hours and fifteen minutes, which is long for a comedy, but they kept it going the whole time. Really very funny. It's the best film we've both seen in a while.

Andrew got a job at the Apple store! He will be the Final Cut Pro guru. I will be a happy girl when the iphone comes out, he gets a discount! He starts on the 14th, and so we want to do something fun before. We're thinking maybe drive down to Mexico, or go camping.

I didn't get the job for the Essential Oil Assistant. I'm too honest. I think had I lied about our justation here, I would have gotten it. We hit it off very well, and we had the same ideas about life and well-being. But I can't lie to people. They wanted someone who would be around for the long haul, and we've got three months left. Oh well. Something else will come along where I won't have to worry about that.

Two days ago we went to Breakers, which is a water park. I was super excited. LOVE water parks! This one- not so much. It was dirty and worn down. They played Country Music- barf! I think Boise has spoiled us. Everything there is super nice and always kept up. I realize Boise doesn't have to compete with the desert climate year round, but a can of paint here and there really isn't debilitating, is it? We took only one picture, and it was before we left.
We did sit in the wave pool for a long time. We now really want to go to the real ocean.







We dont know yet about the puppy. We're hoping. I know it's jumping the gun, but I keep going to this website of this breeder here in Tucson who just had three litters. One of the litters had three white boxers! We've done a lot of research on white boxers, and because they are non-showable a lot of times breeders euthanize them when they are born. Rediculous! The American Kennel Club will sometimes let you register them depending on their pedigree, but you can not show them (which obviously doesn't matter to us). The white ones are not really rare, as some would have you believe, but they do have a higher chance of getting sunburned. Other than that, they are just super cute. We had origionally said, if we are able, we wanted to get a girl (there is one with the funniest little brown spot on her head), but there is also an adorable little white boy. You just never know until you meet them. We also think the first female of the first litter is super sweet.
Anyway, we are hoping. And Ross & Elizabeth, if you are reading this, please don't think this was a cheap ploy to get you to look at the puppies and see how incredibly adorable they are and say yes ;)

Friday, June 1, 2007

Health and stuff

I think I mentioned that I had started a new Fitness plan, and I hate to write a didactic blog, but I am IN LOVE with this plan! There is also a blog to follow on those days when you feel like you just can't drag your butt to the gym. You can read it here. It has some wit, some struggle, some inspiration. I like it a lot. Also there is just a ton of good info at Womenshealthmag.com. Anything from eating tips, to exercises for your body shape, to sex and relationship stuff.

I dig it.

Plea To All Gym-Going People

Please, oh please! brush your teeth before you hop on an eliptical inches away from other eliptisizing folk. I realize working out causes people to sweat, therefore have an unpleasant odor. However, there is a fundamental difference between smelling sweaty and having the most incomprehesible funk coming out of your mouth with every puff of energy, causing people who only want to be healthy to end their workouts early.
Hmph!

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Lightning Strikes Twice


There once was a couple, Andrew and Heidy, who loved each other very much. They decided to have some fun one afternoon and so went miniature golfing.

Andrew thought he would beat Heidy, but Heidy thought she would win. You see, this wasn't the first time the couple had played each other in miniature golf. There had only been the one time before, but Andrew didn't like to talk about it much. Andrew had lost before to Heidy at this very sport. The couple decided to make a friendly wager. If Heidy won, Andrew owed her 3 half hour massages. If Andrew won, Heidy was obligated to serve him breakfast in bed for four mornings.
With the wager set, the game was on!

It was neck and neck for several holes, both staying right on par. But soon Heidy pulled ahead. She was two strokes in the lead! Her excitement didn't last long, though. It is a flightly temptress, this game we call miniature golf. And it can change as quickly as you can say "argyle vest." Andrew pulled into the lead after a particularly dastardly hole.

Heidy was starting to feel that all was lost, as Andrew was ahead by four strokes. Slowly and surely, stroke by stroke, she pulled even with him. It was a tied game yet again!
Then Heidy was in the lead once again! She giggled and tried her hardest to not look smug. Andrew tried his hardest to not growl.
And then the unthinkable happened. Maybe it was ego getting in the way, maybe it was fate-- Heidy missed a seemingly easy shot.

She cursed so vehemently under her breath, she made dead sailors the world over proud. It came down to the very last hole. Andrew being one stroke better than Heidy, took the put. If he made it, He could put to rest the sad memory of his very talented and important girlfriend beating him that long ago evening. He would have won! He stepped up and prepared to put, wiggling his hiney ever so slightly. He hit the ball...it rolled up into the hole... bounced out... rolled down and out of bounds. He took a one-stroke penalty and prepared to put once again. All was not lost, he told himself. If he made this, and Heidy didn't make it on her first try, he would still be the winner.
He once again hit the ball, it went in!!!!!
Now it was up to Heidy. Taking a deep breath, she placed her green ball on the put matt. Club connected with ball. Ball screamed up the green, sinking into the hole! Heidy won!






Even though Andrew lost, he recognized that there were just certain things Heidy was better at than he, and certain things he was better at than she. For instance, Andrew knew he had Heidy on being able to pee standing up. And he was okay with that.
The couple went home, watched The OC, made dinner, then watched the finale to LOST. All in all, they decided it was a good day.